In a world obsessed with calorie-counting and numbers on scales, holistic weight-loss coach Kylie Ryan is getting real results for her female clients, not a diet book in sight. Having dealt with my own weight and body image issues over the years, I wanted to get an insight into Kylie’s approach, which is helping thousands of women let go of the self-damaging beliefs (and the symptom i.e: weight) and finally embrace their inner goddess.
I sat down with the vivacious Aussie to ask some questions that will hopefully inspire you if weight and negative self-talk has been an issue in your life.
How did you come to work in the weight-loss field?
I struggled with my weight from puberty all the way to my early twenties. When I was 19, I was very close to hitting triple figures. I went to the gym for years and even went to work at a gym in the hope it would help me lose weight. I tried all sorts of crazy diets, and lost a few kilos, but got stuck at about 85 kilograms. It wasn’t until I stumbled upon mindset coaching and hypnosis 10 years ago, that my life began to turn around. I started singing professionally, found the love of my life, lost 30 kilograms, got out of debt, off drugs and started my own business in the space of a year after my coaching sessions. I have stayed at a slim and healthy 60 kilograms for 10 years now. I became very excited about the possibilities of sharing this awesome work with others. It became clear that working to help women with weight-loss was my mission and calling. A woman’s relationship with her body is a barometer of her self-worth and self-love.
Why doesn’t traditional dieting work?
Traditional dieting has been proven to not work in study-after-study. Millions all over the world who are dieting are getting fatter and fatter. One of many reasons it doesn’t work is that it requires too much massive change, all in one go. The all or nothing mindset doesn’t work for dieting. These kinds of radical shifts, where multiple habits are required to change, never last in the long term because there is too much going on for you to successfully embed anything as an unconscious habit. Eventually you forget to do them or you get sick of the restriction and rebel by overeating. A deeper reason they don’t work is that traditional diets are steeped in self-loathing and comparison with others.
I tried all sorts of crazy diets, and lost a few kilos, but got stuck at about 85 kilograms. It wasn’t until I stumbled upon mindset coaching and hypnosis 10 years ago, that my life began to turn around.
How do you approach weight-loss?
It’s not about weight loss at all. It is about bringing the mind, body and spirit back into alignment with each other, through self-love. In fact, the biggest step I have to take with my ladies is to retrain them to stop focussing on the scale and their weight as a measure of their worth. My approach to weight loss is personal development, mindset coaching and education: teaching women the skills and tools to ask themselves the right questions, so they can begin to rediscover their passion for life, begin to look critically at the limiting beliefs and thoughts that have held them back in the past, and one by one let them go using my cutting edge mindset tools of coaching, hypnosis, NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques). It’s the longer path for sure, and takes courage and effort, but the rewards are mind-blowing and lasting!
When someone loses weight through your program, what other areas of their life improve too, if at all?
They absolutely do! The ladies find all aspects of their lives are transformed. Weight loss is a by-product of the internal shift that I help facilitate for these women… these deep shifts have ripple effects through every part of their lives. Some of my women have left unfulfilling or abusive relationships, started businesses, found a deeper connection with spirit/God, started making more money at work, got out of debt, got a promotion, rekindled a romance with their life partner, become a better, happier parent. So many benefits…
Millions all over the world who are dieting are getting fatter and fatter. One of many reasons it doesn’t work is that it requires too much massive change, all in one go.
What do you believe are the common triggers for weight gain? Is it simply the love of food?
Not at all. Yes everybody loves food. We all do. Food is a wonderful sensory pleasure. From the very first taste of breast milk as a tiny baby, food has been associated with comfort, safety and love. The deep triggers for weight gain go much deeper than loving food. There is an unconscious feeling of danger associated with being slim. There is disconnect between mind and body. Sometimes there has been past abuse or trauma of some kind… sometimes just a deep belief of not being good enough, or unworthy of being who they desperately want to be. Often there is a secondary gain to being overweight, like protection, or avoidance of other painful issues. Common triggers can include fatigue, emotional upset, feeling unfulfilled or bored with life, depression, anxiety and stress. The key underlying factor that links all of these, and causes someone to turn to food for comfort, is the disconnect… not knowing better strategies to process emotions, not feeling worthy to take the time and effort to look after oneself, and a lack of genuine support and encouragement.
What breakthroughs have you had with clients?
One of my ladies dropped a massive nine centimetres from each thigh—her trouble zone—got out of a damaging relationship, and after years of apologising for herself, started her own inspirational blog! She is a powerhouse of positivity, even looking at injury and setbacks as just a “plot-twist”! One of my ladies went from eating McMuffins for breakfast each morning and no exercise, to easily eating healthy food easily, and taking her kettle bells with her when she travels. she is so committed to working out! Many have overcome depression and anxiety, begun eating mindfully and rediscovered their calling and true mission in life.
Can you explain how your program works?
M program is an online transformation program delivered through a private members only site and forum. There are 40 videos and 20 hypnosis sessions delivered in an eight-module course, with a growing library of recommendations to awesome other resources. It’s designed to be a resource that the ladies can revisit many times through their health journey. As they grow and change, new challenges surface, new boundaries, comfort zones and decisions need to be made.
Often there is a secondary gain to being overweight, like protection, or avoidance of other painful issues. Common triggers can include fatigue, emotional upset, feeling unfulfilled or bored with life, depression, anxiety and stress.
They say what you focus on, you receive. Does this mean people should be focusing on being healthy rather than losing weight?
So true. Yes. Yes. Yes. People who struggle with their weight, need to eliminate weight-loss from their vocabulary, instead focus on creating health, creating genuine joy in their lives, creating energy through activity and nourishing foods.
What is one piece of advice you would like to offer to everyone who struggles with their weight?
Bring your intention back to the realisation of self-love and creating joy and service through your gifts and talents. Remember that you are so much more than the body you reside in. Your spirit is limitless. In your day-to-day life, before every choice, ask yourself two simple questions: Will this feel good and be good for my body and spirit? Will it take me towards my goals?
Kylie’s 12 Action Steps to Weight-Loss
1) Turn off push notification on your phone. Stop checking email and social media every waking second.
2) Drink more water.
3) Aim to incorporate a green vegetable in every meal.
4) A green smoothie is an excellent way to sneak in extra serves.
5) Focus on bringing in more whole, unprocessed food into your normal eating plan, rather than drastically eliminating foods.
6) Learn to create healthy versions of the foods you love.
7) Incorporate more incidental activity into your day.
8) Give yourself some quiet time to get clear on what your ideal life would look like.
9) Create a future memory of a moment inside your body where you feel complete freedom, joy and bliss in the moment.
10) Get rid of your scales.
11) Take photos each month, as well as waist, hip measurements to monitor your progress.
12) Schedule time each week to do something that inspires you and that you love.
Find out more about Kylie Ryan and her program at www.mymindcoach.com.au